Thursday, April 5, 2012

Affirmations

A while back my therapist asked me to gather 5 qualities of myself from people I love and trust w/ a brief description of why they admire those qualities in me. I couldn't believe the beautiful things that were said and how deeply it touched me. Especially since my self esteem is pretty non-existent. My sex addiction and same-sex attraction has convinced me I'm nothing but a bottom-of-the-barrel, scum loving, rotten, depraved faggot. So to read the qualities that others see in me, just as the Lord does, is like a ray of sunshine in my soul. ♥ Thank you, to everyone, for continuing to love me despite my weaknesses.

Wife:
1) He is Motivated. When he knows what he wants, he just jumps right in and does it! No procrastinating, no feet dragging, he just goes for it! He has helped me go from being a procrastinator, to being motivated too, and I am grateful!
2) A Devoted Father. His kids are his everything, and he is always so happy to see them and play with them! He tries to find new ways to make special memories with and for them, and he is always, always willing to help me out with them! I don't know what I or they would do with out him.
3) Compassionate. "_____" has been through a lot in his life, and hasn't always been treated kindly, so he goes out of his way to treat others, especially the "underdog" with kindness, and compassion. He feels very deeply for people and their troubles. He has a heart of gold!
4) Thoughtful. "_____" is always thinking of ways he can brighten someone's day. On birthdays, he goes out of his way to do special things, and always makes a mental note of things people say they want, and then suprises them with that gift. He is so sentimental and tries to do things for others they will deeply love and appreciate. He always spoiles me rotten.
5) Hard Worker. To go with the motivated comment, "_____"is such a hard worker. He is so particular about what he does and will only do things to the best of his ability. Everything he does is done with everything in him. He takes pride in his work and is willing to do anything that is asked of him....even give up a whole saturday to help my mom and step-dad chop down trees :)

I could go on forever, but what it ultimately comes down to is that "_____" is an amazing, extraordinary person, and I love him with all my heart and appreciate the wonderful person that he is!

Mother-in-Law:
1) "____" is such a Thoughtful Person! Always thinking of others and what he can do for them. He is always doing special things for me, that no one else would think of. He shares my love of vintage, old things, and is always trying to find nostalgic things for me. He always makes me feel special and loved, even though I'm just the Mother-in-Law.
2) "_____" is such a Hard Worker. Everything he does, he does so well. He always puts his all into his work and anything else he does. He is always willing to help out, even when it's not fun.
3) He is such a Loving Father to my grandchildren. I know they are his whole world and he would lay down his life for them. They are always first and forefront on his mind and he is always trying to do the best things for them. He is also so wonderful to help my daughter out whenver she needs it (which is always). He is a true example of what a devoted father should be.
4) So few people in this world Take Pride in what they do anymore, but "_____" always does. He would never want anyone to catch him doing something poorly. He always tries to do whatever he is doing, to the very best of his ability, and not because he has to, but because he wants to. He wants everyone to know that if something is worth doing, then it is worth doing well. It's definitely an admirable quality in this day and age.
5) "_____" has the most amazing Musical Talents and I am always in awe of them! He is so quick to dismiss these talents, saying that he is "ok" or "mediocre," but what we all see is someone of amazing talent that we all envy and admire. He is so talented, yet so humble about it, and always willing to share his talents at the drop of a hat. Personally, I could listen to him play the piano all day long. I am so grateful to have a son-in-law with an amazing musical talent like this one!

I love you "_____"! You're an amazing person! I know if anyone can overcome their challenges, it will be you!

Best Friend #1
1) Talented. You are very talented in many ways. You can speak two languages, play the piano, the violin, you can ski and ride snow machines and can garden and keep a lawn like you mean it! You are talented!
2) Capable. You have always been a go-to-guy when it comes to completing tasks that are given to you. No matter if it is tackling a tough spreadsheet or managing the store inventory. Based on what I have seen you do, you can handle any task that is given you and accomplish it within the parameters that are given you.
3) Hard Working. You are always on time to work and you know how to work hard. Especially when it comes to what matters most. Convention, store inventory, recognition, farming, yard work, symphony, it does not matter. You work hard and always do what it takes to get the job done, RIGHT!
4) Loyal. To those you love and who care for you, you are a very loyal friend. You have always been willing to help me whenever I have needed it and have always sent me a 3pm text to make sure I am on track and having a good day. That is invaluable to me and the others who are on the receiving end of your loyalty.
5) Dependable. can always depend on you to be my friend and be there for me no matter what. I can depend on you to see me for who I am and never leave me for dead. There is nothing like a friend who is dependable and whom I can always trust.

Best Friend #2
1) You have a great desire to be a Good Husband and Father. It shows in your commitment to your wife and kids. It shows in the time you spend w/ them. You stive to be transparent with your wife which helps create a strong bond between you and her.
2) In spite of the difficult challenge of SSA and its effects in your life, you work hard to keep your more carnal Desires in Control. It is manifest in your commitment to attend SA and your work with your therapist. It shows in your taking control of your life, removing friends and other negative influences from your life. It shows in your honesty with your bishop.
3) You are a Hard Worker. The work you do for your company is top notch. You have untapped potential to do even more, and I'm confident you will as circumstances improve either there or somewhere else. You are intelligent. The combination of hard work, intelligence, and creativity will allow you to always provide well for your family.
4) You Take Pride in your home and yard. Your home is beautiful and so is your yard. The comfortable, safe home you provide for your family is a huge blessing to your family. They will respect and love you for it.
5) You are a Great Friend. You show it by caring for others, empathizing with others, and listening. Your personality is engaging and attractive. I see in you a man of strength and character who will absolutely prevail in the battle of self.

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