Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Chemical Castration

I have been doing a lot of research lately on chemical castration. Chemical castration is using drugs or medication to reduce sex drive/libido. In various studies it has shown diminished desires for deviant sexual behavior, less frequent sexual fantasies, and greater control over sexual urges. While I don't believe chemical castration is a fool-proof method to completely counter or thwart my deviant sexual behaviors (it's all in my head!)  I think it may be just the ticket to help get me some much needed and desired control, sobriety, and time between me and my addictive behaviors. So I made a Doctor appointment for tomorrow to possibly get a Depo Provera shot.

I do admit I am nervous about the side effects the Depo Provera shot can cause (not libido-reducing). Being as how Depo Provera is female birth control, things such as weight gain, breast enlargement, voice changes, reduced body hair, and loss of muscle mass can and do occur! I know I have a lot of deep-seeded issues, but wanting to be a woman or be more feminine sure isn't one of them. However, I'm willing to do it if it's going to help me get my feet back under me and my head out of the clouds.

I am going to discuss with my Doctor other drug alternatives; possibly other anti-depressants aside from Prozac and Paxil which tend to decrease sex drive. Perhaps there's something else I could try before I actually go the Depo Provera route. I'll let you know how my appointment  goes and what happens. Stay tuned.


  1. This sounds pretty extreme. If you feel this is the only way to help you break your addiction, then I wish you the very best in your choices and decisions. You have my full support. I really love you and want you to be happy, to be free of the things that have hurt you. If I, as someone who knows you from your blog, only, can love you A LOT, just imagine how much the Savior and Heavenly Father love you, They who know everything about you, have created you, and from Whom you have inherited wings of Glory. They love you. If you do not yet know this, please believe on what I know and have felt from Them: They love you, They love me, and They are there, to help you through this.

    Please take good care of yourself. :) You have not yet said whether you told your parents what you needed to tell them. Do you have their support in your life? The support of your wife and children?

    I hope you find support from all the people who love you and whom you love. Sending good thoughts, love, and energy your way. (I do not know if you live in Utah or not- sorry, I do not remember- but, I will NOT wish you the ARCTIC COLD weather we are currently having. It is BITTER COLD!!)

    Happy day! I love you, Duck

  2. I'm sorry that you feel this is something you need to do. My thoughts and best wishes are with you my friend.